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Dating Romantic

5 Secrets To Texting A Guy You Like That Will Help Build Attraction And Connection

Secret #1: Avoid the “vomit text.”

Texting is meant to be a quick, convenient form of communication. That being said, it’s easy to get carried away to type out a big long novel (I know, I’ve been there before!) Avoid texting an entire conversation in one text. Instead, allow the conversation to flow and evolve naturally, instead of trying to get the entire story of your day into one text message. A good rule of thumb: if he has to scroll, it’s too long!

Secret #2: Avoid “machine gun texts”

Machine gun texts are similar to the vomit text, except instead of sending one big long text, you send one question after another, without giving him time to respond to each question. Texting should feel like a game of ping-pong – he texts you, you text him back, he responds, you respond, etc. The conversation should feel interactive, and have a natural back and forth, instead of asking all of your questions out of the gate and waiting for him to reply to each one. Because who wants to do that, right?

Secret #3: Avoid fighting over text

Now, this may seem like a no-brainer, and often it’s not done intentionally. However, if you’re disagreeing, the only way to reach reconciliation is to talk in person or get on the phone. If you send things like “I can’t believe you! call you now!” that feels a lot like someone holding up a bear trap and being like “hey you, stick your foot in there.

Secret #4: Add value to his life

Avoid being a “vamp” or someone who sucks the energy out of you. Sending things like “I’m so bored” or “Ugh, I have nothing to do” sends the impression that you’re looking for someone to entertain you, or just plug into their life so you can “suck” the fun out of theirs. Instead be the person who adds light, love, and laughter to your interaction. Even if you are bored, you can send things like funny pictures of GIFs which will keep even the dullest day lighthearted and fun.

Secret #5: Avoid the unworthy “just”

This may seem nitpicky, but avoid starting sentences with words like “just” and “hope.” For example: “Just checking in” or “Hope I’ll see you again soon.” These words have an apologetic tone, which reeks of unworthiness. 

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