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4 Ways to Cure Your Own Depression

Many folks confuse sadness with depression. Sadness is a natural state, a necessary part of living. Friendships end. Death steals loved ones. Life provides us with plenty of reasons to feel sad. Feeling sad is appropriate at such times — and indispensable. The need to mourn, to feel sadness, is an essential part of what it means to be human. When we honor sadness, it provides us with essential space for self-reflection, and greater empathy and compassion. It also may compel us to recognize difficult truths or inspire us to make better choices.

1 An Unresolved Conflict. Is there a problem in one of your relationships? Is there something at work that is unsettling you? Unaddressed conflicts cause chronic psychological stress and are fundamental to many forms of depression.

2. A Repetition Compulsion. Look for a common theme in your depression, one that repeats itself. This is most often a repetition of early experiences in your life. The most common themes I hear in my office include: I’m always the outsider; I can’t trust anyone; and Nobody understands me. Without insight, we get trapped in a repetitive cycle and repeat the same problem over and over again. Find out what that unresolved part of your history is that you keep replaying.

3. Self-Neglect. Burnout and depression go hand in hand. When you neglect yourself, everyone suffers. You’re no fun to be around; you don’t enjoy work or play; and you drag others down with you. Reward yourself, treat yourself, and give yourself the attention and TLC you crave. You’ll be surprise how much better you’ll feel.

4. Self-Slander. Low self-esteem and self-slander are the major driving forces of all forms of depression. These negative internal voices shape your self-image and the way you see yourself and others. You’ll start to see others as better and more appealing than you, even when it’s not even true. Such toxic affirmations drain your energy and leave you forever dissatisfied. After all, if you’re constantly telling yourself that you’re powerless or unattractive, you eventually will become both.

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